Wow this week I need to run wild through the ocean waves while howling like a wolf.
My belief is, to have a healthy interaction, everyone must be able to speak and be responsible for only one’s self.
Questions like, “Do you need help? Can I help you?” shows awareness and empathy for another.
We need more of this!
But what do you do when questions are offered and the other person has not asked for anything?
I have been hearing this question often from strangers. As an individual who has recently been using an assistive device to get around in this crazy world of ours, I need to give a perspective from a squiggly or someone who is challenged.
We all may have difficulty asking for help. Yet, when one has not asked, if someone offers it, it can make one feel not part of the tribe known as human.
Try to not ask unless there is a clear situation in which the person needs it. Example, I was coming home on the metro rail. I ride an electric scooter and as I was trying to get into the car, the ledge for entry was not high enough and I got stuck. A gentleman jumped up and helped me into the car safely before the doors closed. Compare that to, I was coming out of the elevator to wait for the next train. An individual walked over and asked if I was going up to the street? As a courtesy, I said “no, but if you are asking how to get up to the street, you can look at the posted signs.”
Her response was, “No, it was for you. You looked like you needed help.”
Huh? I never asked you for help? What if she said, “Do you need help getting up to the street?”
Then, I could have said, “No, thank you. Or “Yes, “please help me with…”
Treat everyone with respect. Ask questions.
Let the other person in the interaction be responsible for their part.
Do not make judgements.
There are many things that make us unique. If you do not communicate by asking questions, like offering help when someone has not asked, it can be perceived as placing yourself above the other person. But if you ask questions, everyone is honored. It is pure communication.
We all are navigating our own lanes. I do not have time to navigate my lane and respond to your concern if I have not indicated or shown a need for help. Ask Questions.
If you disagree, I would love to hear from you.